Rollin'

Probably you are familiar with these* shoes or something similar. I am more than familiar with them after having several students in my class this year who wore them. Because it makes sense that you should buy your child $70 wheeled tennis shoes when you can't even pay for your child's school breakfast and lunch every day. Ahem. But I digress.

So my students at school had these skate-shoe things and drove me crazy with their not-so-subtle attempts to skate with them in the classroom, or the hall, or the lunchroom. The rule (school rule, not my rule, although I would have made it my rule if it didn't already exist) was that you couldn't use them as skates at school, and as a teacher, I could enforce that rule. I actually even made a couple of kids take their wheels out at school after one too many reminders to STOP SKATING across my classroom.

Now it's summer and we are out and about, and I can no longer enforce the no skating rule in public places that I go, and it's driving me NUTS. Target, for example. At no point is there a good reason for your child to be zooming down the aisles of Target. Target even has signs posted outside its entrances that say something like, "No rollerskating, rollerblading, or skateboarding on the premises." I'm sure when they made that sign they were referring to the wide expanse of concrete and asphalt that is their parking lot and entryway, but come on, parents. If they don't want your kids to do it OUTSIDE their store, I am pretty darn sure they don't want your kids to do it INSIDE their store. I have given more dirty looks to these skate-shoe-parents than I can count. They don't get it.

I, for one, have no plans to get the skate-shoes for my own daughters. I love them dearly (my daughters, not the skate-shoes), but 1) the skate-shoes don't really seem all that practical, or more importantly, SAFE. My girls are not what you would call the picture of gracefulness. They trip over their own feet with great frequency. Why would I add wheels into that equation? 2) They have not asked me for the skate-shoes (come to think of it, I have not seen them on any of their friends either. Maybe they're not as popular with the six-year-old set?) And 3) even if they did ask for them, I would say no because they cost $70, and with twins I would have to buy TWO pairs, and I cannot remember the last time I spent $70 on a pair of shoes for myself, so why would I spend $70 EACH for my children to get shoes they will outgrow in a few months?

I am asking, nicely, one more time, for the safety and sanity of the American people, if your child has the skate-shoes, SUPERVISE THEM in places where they are not supposed to skate, and then take them someplace safe where it actually is a good place to skate. And make them wear helmets and kneepads and elbow pads when they do it. Thank you.

*I really hesitate to put this link here, for the simple reason that I do not want to bring them any more business than they already have.